bored
08/06/26
there's so much i wanna say but i feel like i cant say anything becuase im scared of what could happen and i dont wanna reveal a lot? i dont know
i need to get medicated, there's so much that im just now getting educated about that makes me think i was on the complete wrong side of tackling my issues
originally i thought that it was depression that stopped me from functioning like a human being, but i was just so uneducated on what ADHD actually does... i dont know
gonna talk with my therapist about it, i dont know
thing i hate about ADHD is that my uncle says "im lying" im not, i have adhd, i literally don't remember anything said to me, i try to remember, i really do but it doesn't work like that
tasks like actually taking care of myself are obsolete in this brain, i barely remember to brush my teeth before seeing my partner, i don't take showers as much as i really should, and i get overwhelmed in school. almost in college btw (im enrolled)
college student and adult btw (i feel horrible)
should i even call this a miniblog at this point? idk
i wonder if im bipolar probably not probably just mood swings i feel so awful rn
if my friends are seeing this, can we make a real channel in the discord for venting or stuff i dont know how to bring up some of this stuff without sounding stupid and bringing down the mood
i dont know
FOLLOWING IS CENSORED: NOT FOR THE FAINT OF HEART.
CONTENT WARNING!!!!
sometimes i just think about killing myself. don't know why im censoring this, i guess for the faint of heart? this is my site i can talk about whatever i want. im just scared of life, i made so many mistakes please just let me restart. am i even taking my antidepressants do they even work fuck me. i can't kill myself because people love me but i really just want to die. i can't handle life anymore, i'm a fuckup, bad at life and rational decision, i lie all the time to my friends (really dont wanna but i can't stop for some reason, although i am really trying to be as honest as i can), i wonder how many more times i can say im ok before i wind up kicking the bucket.
08/04/26
all my videos are privated, that was intentional, consulting with my friends on what i should do
08/04/26
i forget to update this site at times anyway i made my vtuber debut and it's freakign awesome.... i love what i made
07/26/26
i need to get better at music production ASAP... like i'm decent at it but i wanna be better at it. and painting too I wanna paint that would be fun
07/16/26
rendering right now and im sitting here in my chair thinking of............. actually idk
i am excited for this project of mine im working on, and if you haven't seen it.... you should.........
i modified this page specifically for this cool embed thing that'll be used starting now
07/08/26
sometimes i think
07/06/26
drunk people are fun to be around a little bit, they're so unpredictable
07/05/26
im beyond the realm of they/them and any/all.... i am she/something.....
07/02/26
i like editing
06/30/26